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      ''Oh, come with me to the rolling sea
       While the weather's calm and still..."
 

    The very-real location of Dorset's Portland Bill Lighthouse was the basis for
    this John Grace/FilmFair series. But in a slight twist to truth, the show's
    lighthouse was named Guillemot Rock, and Portland Bill became the name
    of its keeper. Ross and Cromarty were Bill's muddling assistants, and Dogger
    their pet pooch. Life in the lighthouse was never dull, with all the repairs and
    cleaning to do, storms to weather and provisions to acquire. Not to mention,
    the mermaids, penguins, and treasure. Each episode featured two short
    tales with a musical intermission...

    Notice the character names there, based on the shipping forecast, and
    continued in the roll call of secondary characters: Fastnet the fisherman,
    Mrs Lundy, Grandma Tiree and Inspector Ronaldsway. These fine folk lived
    on the mainland. When the weather was calm and still, Bill and the gang
    would take their rowboat "The Puffin" over to the little village and stock up
    on supplies from Edward Stones' grocery and provisions store.

    This was such a simple series concept, beautifully executed, with lots of
    splendid set dressing and detail, like Edward Stones' well-stocked store.
    John Grace and Mik Parsons' title song and incidental shanties caught the
    mood of the piece perfectly. And although this was aimed at a younger
    audience, some of Ross and Cromarty's foolish shenanigans were very
    funny.

      

    "Portland Bill" was devised, designed, scored and scripted by John Grace. Sadly,
    John passed away in March 2004. His animation CV was extensive and varied
    and included "Pablo -The Little Red Fox", "64 Zoo Lane", "Kipper", "Big Hug",
    "Boris the Bat" and "Ethelbert the Tiger". His shows won a shelf-load of awards.
    On top of all this, John  co-created the breakthrough CGI series "ReBoot" - what
    a world away from the salty delights of Guillermont Rock!

    Trivia Hounds will note that the late great Norman Rossington provided the
    "Portland Bill" voices and narration. Norman's film and tv appearances included
    "A Hard Day's Night", "Charge of the Light Brigade", "Digby - The Biggest Dog
    in the World", "I Claudius", and three early Carry-On movies. He died, aged 70
    in 1999 and, according to Ghoul Britannia could well be the only actor ever to
    have appeared with both The Beatles and Elvis Presley... 

    • The international sales agents for the series are offering broadcasters an
       interesting programming choice. Stations can take the series proper,
       25 x 11mins, or split deftly into five minutes strands 50 x 5mins. This
       is quite common practice noawadays...

 

    

    Portle chortle...

    Now here's a bit of fun spied in that splendidly irreverent 80s comic Oink!
    It's from the October 1988 edition #67 and it's a spoof on "Portland Bill" titled
    "Portland Pratt". Dross, Crockerty and the gang are expertly caractured by
    artist Ed McHenry. Charlie Brooker's script has Bill/Pratt making a right fool
    of himself when, after a day off from lighthouse duty, he comes back and
    switches off the light. Amongst the casualties who wreck themselves on the
    rocks is none other than the spinach-master himself Popeye!